"You Are Loved"

In 2021 I applied for a sole/senior pastor position at Maida Vale Baptist and made it to the interview stage. The following (which I wrote down not long afterwards) happened a few days before my interview.

“I asked God if there was anything I needed to know for my interview for Maida Vale Baptist Church. I heard ‘you are loved’ in my head. I couldn’t see why I would think that in response to the question, and it seemed consistent with stories I’d heard of God saying similar things to other people, so I concluded that it was God speaking to me. It seemed strange to me that it didn’t have any accompanying feelings of being loved or ‘wow factor’ feelings of ‘God just spoke to me’.

The next day when I told my mum about it, she said she had been praying about the interview too, and had a similar experience (although different of course - e.g. included feelings). This seemed to confirm that yes, what I had heard was God. I’m not sure why God decided to tell me that at that time though.

(As a side note I’ve been complaining to God that he doesn’t talk to me much, so if nothing else, I should be thankful for such a prompt answer to my direct question).”

Looking Back

I can also remember afterwards worrying to myself, ‘Wait, why would God say that? Does this mean I won’t get the job?’

I was right. I didn’t get it…

It seems odd to worry in response to God telling me he loved me. I guess the point was that God still loved me, even if he didn’t give me the job that I was hoping for.